Preparing for Your First Ramadan

If you have embraced Islam sometime in the last year, then you're probably preparing right now for your first Ramadan. If you've not grown up with exposure to Muslim cultures, then you might discover many new customs, habits, clothes, and foods these days. Hopefully you'll make many new friends in addition to all the spiritual benefits and blessings that come with the month of fasting.

But while many Muslims look forward to Ramadan months in advance, if this is your first you might be feeling anxious--so I'd like to offer a few tips to help ease any worries ahead of time.

Intention


Much can be said about the importance of intention (niyyah) in Islam. We're told that we need to "make intention" before beginning any act of worship, like wudhu or prayer, and this goes for fasting too. But when it comes to Ramadan, and fasting in particular, you might find that with the correct intention, you are able to focus on and commit to an act more than if you were just doing it for yourself. So remind yourself that you are fasting for the sake of Allah, to follow His commands, and to seek His mercy and forgiveness.

Tips

• Make your intention at the beginning of Ramadan to fast for the month for the sake of Allah, seeking His forgiveness. 
• Renew your intention daily before fajr to remind yourself why you're fasting. 
• While you make intention, take an opportunity to review the start and end times of the fast for the day on your timetable. 

The Days of Ramadan


As soon as you can, get your hands on a prayer timetable. You're going to want to keep track of a few things during Ramadan (and all year round, so if you can get a yearly table for your area, you should.) For Ramadan, you'll want to know when it starts, the dates of certain days and nights, like which are even and which are odd, and when the 27th is, for example, when it ends, the time to start fasting and the time to stop fasting, and all prayer times throughout the day.

The First Day
It's not always possible to know ahead of time when exactly Ramadan is going to start because Muslims follow a lunar calendar for determining religious holidays. But you can have a pretty good idea. Each one of the 12 months is 29 or 30 days long, and the month before Ramadan is called Sha'ban. You'll want to find out from your local mosque when they expect Ramadan to be.

A note on moonsighting--it's unlikely that all mosques in your area will have the same start and end dates of Ramadan, because some use different criteria for sighting (or not sighting) the moon. You should pick one that you trust and stick with it. 

They might have a date confirmed already based on astronomical calculations, so you'll know when to start fasting. Or, they might tell you when the 29th of Sha'ban will be, after which they will wait to see if the moon has been spotted. If it is spotted, then Ramadan officially starts that night. You'll want to check their website or call someone who might know in order to find out, if you're not able to attend maghrib and isha prayers at the masjid yourself.

In a Muslim calendar, the night precedes the day, so the first of Ramadan will start at maghrib prayer, and taraweeh prayers will begin on that night after Isha prayer. 

If it is not spotted, then it means Sha'ban is lasting 30 days instead of 29. So do not fast on the 30th, but Ramadan will begin at maghrib the next day without any question of moon-sighting.

And don't forget to make your intention to fast for the month of Ramadan!

Tips

• Find out when Ramadan starts by contacting a local mosque. 
• Get a hold of their prayer timetable as soon as you can--they might publish one before Ramadan, but should definitely have one afterwards. 
• Make plans for finding out if Ramadan has started--know which website to check, or number to call, if the date isn't already set. 

The Night of Power

The Night of Power, Laylat al-Qadr, is a special night in the last 10 nights of Ramadan when your du'aa are most likely to be answered, so you definitely want to catch this night in prayer. It will be on the last odd nights of Ramadan, so you should keep an eye on your calendar/timetable. Many people believe it is on the 27th so you might find even bigger crowds at the mosque on those nights. Be prepared, and arrive early!

Tips

• Make a small list of things you would like to make du'aa for, either before Ramadan or when it starts. 
• Use it to remember what you want to ask for throughout Ramadan and especially on the Night of Power (and all the nights it might be.)
• Try to arrive early at the mosque in the last days of Ramadan--consider breaking your fast there!

The Last Day and Eid
The end of Ramadan comes with similar confusion, unless your mosque has already determined the dates. If the moon is sighted after the 29th, then Ramadan is only 29 days, and the following day will be the holiday Eid al-Fitr. If not, then you'll fast one more day and Eid will be after that. There's no fasting on Eid but lots of takbeer--saying Allaahu Akbar.

When You're Fasting

Starting the Fast
Another reason you'll want a timetable is to know what time in the morning the fast officially starts. It begins at the start time of the fajr prayer, so on your timetable that might be labeled as Fajr or possibly as Imsaak. This is probably going to be pretty early in the morning (especially during these longer summer days) but you still should get up to have a small snack or meal (called suhoor) before beginning the fast. Be sure that you're done by the time the fast begins.

A note on prayer times--they are based on the location of the sun in the sky and they will change daily and vary geographically. If you are travelling during Ramadan, you'll need to know the prayer times for all locations you'll be. You can find this online if you don't know of a mosque in the area. Many smartphones also have apps with prayer times, which you can adjust by changing your location. I use Guidance for my iPhone. 

It's a good idea to renew your intention to fast at this time as well! The food you eat at suhoor is going to last you through the morning. Drink plenty of water and avoid having too much sugar early on. If you have a habit of drinking caffeine, you might want to drink some coffee with your suhoor to avoid getting headaches during the day.

Tips

• Drink plenty of water at suhoor time to stay hydrated throughout the day. 
• Avoid sweets for suhoor which will make you hungry later on. 

During the Fast
While fasting you need to abstain from all food (even gum) and water, as well as marital relations. You can resume all of this at night while you're not fasting.

A note on medical conditions--if you need to take regular medications, or have an illness which might prevent you from fasting, you should see a doctor to make sure it is safe, and see if you need to adjust your medication schedule. If you are still not able to fast, then you might be able to make up the days later if it's temporary, or feed a hungry person for each day if it's permanent. 

Tips

• Be extra-conscious of your behavior, and avoid lying, backbiting, gossip, and useless talk while fasting. 
• Use the fast as a chance to tell people about Islam. 

Ending the Fast
As soon as the adhan is called for maghrib prayer, at sunset, you can break your fast. This is called iftaar.  There is a du'a that you should make, and it's recommended to break your fast with dates and water. Then pray maghrib and enjoy your meal, and don't forget to thank and praise Allah and ask Him for forgiveness.

It's likely that you will have many opportunities to share an iftaar with other Muslims, and I would advise you to take advantage of these opportunities as much as possible. Many mosques host iftaars, sometimes donated and sometimes for a small charge. Look out for community iftaars, or if anyone invites you to a dinner at their home. This is a great way to learn more about Islam and Muslims through interaction, time to spend with Muslim friends you know, and to make new friends, while you share in the blessings of Ramadan.

Tips

• Learn the du'aa to say when breaking the fast. 
• First break your fast with dates and water, and then pray maghrib before eating your meal. 
• Eat light and small quantities of food so you still feel fresh when you go pray taraweeh!

Taraweeh


Every night of Ramadan (starting with the 1st night, which will be before you've started fasting) there will be Taraweeh prayers during which the Qur'an will be recited, basically cover to cover over the 29-30 days. This starts after ishaa prayers at night, and will be either 8 rak'ahs or 21, recited in units of 2. There will probably be a short break after the first 4, and some people might leave after 8, or after 11, if the congregation is performing the witr prayer at that time. You can leave then, if you want, and pray witr in the masjid with the group or at home before suhoor. Or you can wait for the completion of 20 rak'ahs, followed by the 21st which will be the witr.

A note about witr--the word means "odd" and is basically a single unit of prayer, usually following 2 or more units, often separately but sometimes attached. (I.e., 2+1, or 2+2+1, etc, or sometimes 3.) This is a highly recommended prayer, in addition to the mandatory 5, which is prayed at night. It can be prayed anytime after ishaa prayer before fajr comes in, but it's recommended to pray it later, after sleeping. 

Praying Taraweeh can be really rewarding, even if this is your first Ramadan and you don't understand a word of Arabic. Try to attend as much as you can to listen to the Qur'an being recited. To help understand what is being recited, read the translation before you come. And it's a much more rewarding experience than, say, watching TV. If you have some regular shows you watch, plan ahead to record them or stream them after Ramadan, so you can spend as much time as possible during Ramadan in worship.

Tips

• Read a translation of the passage before coming to the prayer so you'll understand more of what's being recited.
• Bring a bottle of water to help you hydrate between the prayers. 
• Come early so parking won't be a problem. 
• You can pray witr at home when you get up for suhoor if you didn't pray it at the mosque. 

Days of Not Fasting


It's a reality that most women will not be fasting for a few days in Ramadan, and it's nothing to be embarrassed about. You can still attend iftaars--the other ladies will understand why you won't be fasting. For days of menstruation, you'll need to make up the fasts later in the year, before next Ramadan, so keep track of how many days of fasting you missed.

A note about menstruation--as soon as you notice it, you should break your fast. Do not pray salaah or fast during this time. You can resume fasting on a day when your period has completely finished before the time of fajr, but you can resume praying as soon as you make ghusl. 

If you are pregnant or nursing, it might be best to check with a scholar for the ruling on making up fasts missed due to pregnancy or nursing. There is agreement that it is permissible to break the fasts, but different opinions regarding whether to make them up or feed a person for a missed day.

If you are travelling or too sick to fast for a few days during Ramadan, then you should make up the days later in the year.

Tips

• If you're not fasting and need to make up days, mark the days on your calendar or timetable so you know how many to make up. (Don't throw it away until you've made them all up!)
• If you're attending an iftar and haven't been fasting, let others go first in getting food as they have been fasting. 

Eid al-Fitr


The holiday at the end of Ramadan is called Eid al-Fitr. The festivities begin after maghrib once Ramadan is officially over, by praising and glorifying Allah. It is good to repeat lots of takbeers at this time, until the Eid prayer in the morning. You should find out ahead of time where and what time the Eid prayer will be--and expect to arrive early. Whether at a mosque, convention center, hotel, or fairgrounds, traffic will probably be a problem. Planning to arrive early (at least 30 minutes before prayer time) is a good way to ensure you have enough time to wait in the traffic, park, and walk to the designated area.

The Takbeer
What you'll hear people repeating from maghrib the night before, up until the gathering and time of prayer, is the following:
Allaahu Akbar Allaahu Akbar Allaahu Akbar (Allaah is greater x3)
Laa Ilaaha Ill-Allaah (There is no god except Allaah)
Allaahu Akbar Allaahu Akbar
Wa Li-llaahi-lHamd (And to Allaah is all praise)

Feel free to join in!

The Prayer
The Eid prayer is much like a regular two-rak'ah prayer like fajr, prayed in congregation, though the takbeer phrase "Allaahu Akbar" will be repeated in the prayer more times than usual. The imam will usually explain this before it starts--just follow what he and the congregation do. After the prayer will be a short sermon, which you should sit and listen through before greeting everyone around you.

The Festivities
Try to find out about Eid activities in your area--there might be Six Flags visits, fairs for children, parties, and other activities to celebrate on Eid and the following days. Have fun!

Ramadan Mubarak!

I appreciate your feedback as comments and by email. If you have additional tips or recommendations, can correct any mistakes, or would like to re-post the article, please do let me know! Anything good is from Allah. 

Taking My Own Advice

A few years ago I posted some thoughts about being a recent convert in Ramadan. In my first few Ramadans, meeting many new people (at iftars, at the masjid, etc.) made a huge impact on me. So I would strongly encourage anyone who can to try and invite new Muslims when hosting iftars. It's a great time to help them learn more about Islam by observing, rather than reading.

Unfortunately, I wasn't able to host any iftaars myself for the last few years because of my living arrangements. So this is my first year hosting--and I did take my own advice and host a few this Ramadan. And alhamdulillah, it's been a lot of fun. I announced my own iftars at other events and a mailing list for local sisters, to have a sisters-only iftar. I've had three, the last one tonight, and saw a different crowd each night. I've also seen many of the same sisters at other iftar events.

Alhamdulillah, the sisters in Seattle already recognized the importance of having iftars for converts and singles who wouldn't otherwise have anyone to celebrate with, and already scheduled weekly iftars. These were another opportunity for me to meet even more people.

It's sad that I'll be leaving soon and won't see these sisters again until next Ramadan, but I'm looking forward to it. And now I'm much more optimistic about stabilizing once I get back from Texas inshaaAllaah, since I feel much less like an outsider than I did even a few weeks ago.

Fitness-Related Ramadan Advice

Because I'm trying this year (more than in previous years) to maintain a healthy lifestyle, it's nice to see all the advice from Muslims about maintaining a healthy lifestyle in Ramadan.

Unfortunately, when the information is posted, some people criticize it by saying that Ramadan is not the time to focus on fitness, and thus the information isn't relevant. First, they make a good point--Ramadan is not the time to focus on fitness. Worship of Allah should be the focus, and the priority. When I hear people make this criticism though, it makes me sad, because it's like saying that fitness isn't important at all, and that we should disregard it in Ramadan.

But I don't think that's realistic. In general we can't disregard school, or work because it's Ramadan (though I get the impression that in some countries people do.) But since fitness can actually make us stronger and better Muslims, and requires year-round consistency, I think it's worth talking about fitness in Ramadan. Not to the exclusion of the importance of worship, of course, but after reading several articles and listening to short talks about the subject, fitness is never placed above worship. Workouts are scheduled around suhoor, iftar, and taraweeh times so as not to conflict with worship and practices from the sunnah.

This audio advice from FitMuslimah.com makes special note of the importance to not set high fitness goals in Ramadan--rather, the goal should be to maintain one's current level of fitness. It's not practical to do much improvement--which requires a specific calorie intake and exercise routine while fasting. In fact, attempting to do so might actually negatively affect the body.

But for people who are used to eating healthy (whether to maintain blood sugar or other health reasons, for weight loss/maintenance, weight gain, or other kinds of training) why should they stop in Ramadan? For people who are used to regular exercise (for its many health benefits) why should they stop in Ramadan? And lose what they work for the rest of the year?

For anyone who isn't used to exercise, Ramadan might not be the best time to start with intense workouts, but a brisk or moderate-paced walk wouldn't go amiss.

Exercising While Fasting

If you haven't come across it yet, there's a good article about working out in Ramadan over at Suhaib Webb's blog: The Ramadan Nutrition and Workout Plan for Success.

Included are good tips and advice for maintaining an exercise routine during the fasts of Ramadan. Unfortunately, I don't think all the advice is actually practical this year--especially in northern latitudes (like Seattle.) Specifically, timing a workout after taraweeh prayers doesn't seem realistic given that isha is not prayed until almost 11pm, and the fasting starts around 4am. So in five hours there is taraweeh prayers (around 2 hours here, I'm told,) and you also want to get up for suhoor and possibly tahajjud as well (especially in the last 10 nights), so I'll say at least an hour, i.e., 3am start all that. Which gives you from 1am-3am for sleeping and exercise. (What!?)

Alright, so I'm not sure if anyone will be sleeping at night around here this Ramadan, since there's not enough time for anything more than a nap--and an extremely disrupted sleep schedule. But working out? At 1am? Seriously?

What kind of workout can you do at 1am, anyway? I have a few training sessions left that will last in to Ramadan, meaning that I have to meet with my personal trainer during Ramadan. And the earliest I can meet her is 5:30am, and the latest I can meet her is 7:30 pm. That's over an hour after fasting begins, and an hour before it ends. And I'm not sure which is better.

Personally, I think I'd rather do my workouts in the gym--where it's safe, well-lit, and a variety of equipment is available. The only exercise I can do at 1am is run. I love riding my bike but I just don't feel safe after dusk.

I've also heard other suggestions about the hours before iftar being a good time to workout. The problem is that after a day of fasting, the body will be weak and dehydrated, but afterwards the body will be extremely ready to receive nutrients. Also, you can rehydrate almost immediately.

I'm thinking I'll give both options a try in the first week and decide what works better for the remaining sessions. Thankfully, my trainer is giving me that flexibility and I won't have to meet her at our normal time of 1pm--at which time there is no benefit whatsoever, except perhaps that the gym isn't crowded.

Anyone else have any thoughts?

Ramadan Webinars

I realized today that I've been "invited" to more webinars for Ramadan than it's going to be possible for me to attend. But in case any of these spark the interest of my readers, I'll just post a list of Ramadan webinars if anyone is looking for some motivation or preparation for the upcoming month of fasting and worship.

If I get any more I'll try to update this list. I have listened to the first one, which is on replay, from Quran for Busy People, and really appreciated it. As for the rest, I can't really say. There's a second upcoming webinar from Quran For Busy People that I might tune in for, or listen if it's on replay inshaaAllaah.

Enjoy!

On Replay:

The Quickest, Easiest, Most Productive Way to Understand the Entire Quran In Arabic... For FREE!

Available at: http://attendthisevent.com/?eventid=13815993

Monday, August 2nd, 7pm EST

Advice to Make This Ramadan the Best Ever

Register at: www.roctraining.com

Tuesday, August 3rd, 7pm EST

Spiritual Management

Register at: www.mumlovesme.com/webinars

Thursday, August 5th, 5pm EST

The Strongest Link

Register at: http://www.habibihalaqas.org/2009/02/fill-out-this-form-to-join.html

Saturday, August 7th, 2pm EST

Healthy Hearts, Healthy Communities: the life and teachings of Imam al-Ghazali in the modern world

Register at: http://www.mishkatmedia.com/travellinglight/

Sunday, August 8th, 7pm GMT

How To Use This Ramadan To Jump-Start Your Personal Journey Through The Quran

Register at: www.quranforbusypeople.com/jtq.html

Sunday, August 8th, 7:10pm EDT

The Fasting and the Furious: how to drive your motivation throughout Ramadan

Register at: http://www.almaghrib.org/ilminar/

Ramadan Confusion

Want to be confused? Read different fiqh opinions regarding Ramadan. It will just blow your mind.

After being volunteered to talk about the fiqh of Ramadan at an upcoming workshop (in addition to just Eid), I've spent a lot of time over the last week reading different fiqh opinions on Ramadan, and am terrified of presenting this weekend, and unsatisfied with the ability of Shaykh Google to clarify matters.

So what is confusing?

The time to start fasting--at fajr, is obvious. But should you start 10 minutes before "to be safe?" Some say yes, some say no. Can you finish eating or must you spit it out if fajr time comes with food in your mouth? I've heard both.

What should pregnant and nursing women do if they break the fast for fear for themselves or the baby? Make it up? Pay a ransom? Both? All opinions exist.

What about injections? Definitely yes because it introduces something to the body? Definitely no because it's not a normal way of eating food? Yes if intravenous but no if intramuscular? Yep, heard all of those too.

What if you accidentally eat or swallow something, though you knew you were fasting? (I.e., you didn't forget.) One school has the opinion that even accidental swallowing can break your fast, while others disagree.

And I guess what bothers me the most about these is that the stricter opinions tend to not make any sense, but just seem like they exist "to be on the safe side." But it just makes things seem so complicated. In reading these opinions, though, it seems like they all sort of bash the other opinions, insisting that they are wrong, or even "bid'ah" (innovation.) So what if people as me questions about these subjects? "Go ask a scholar, and Allah knows best."

Celebrating Eid and Ramadan

In about 10 days inshaaAllaah I'll be giving a talk at a Ramadan workshop for new Muslims about celebrating Ramadan and Eid. I'm thinking it's probably the easiest part of the worskhop--other speakers will be talking about the virtues of Ramadan, the fiqh of Ramadan, and making the most of the spiritual blessings of Ramadan, topics that are deeper and carry much more weight in Ramadan discussions. But I get to tackle the little afterthought--it seems that way after 30 days of fasting and worship--called Eid. So I can't really treat it like an afterthought, can I?

Looking back through some old blogs I saw that when talking about Ramadan and Eid, some people commented that they didn't really know how to celebrate Eid, and despite having been Muslim for a while had never actually been to an Eid prayer or celebration. Thinking back on my own experience now, I realize that I was tremendously helped by other sisters who reached out to me and invited me (or drug me along) to various activities and gatherings. In fact, not only on Eid but throughout Ramadan I was able to experience a new level of sisterhood than I had previously.

So I think that I will spend some time talking about the Eid prayer in such a way that attendees feel encouraged to attend the Eid prayer. And then to talk about socialization to prepare them to actually celebrate the day of Eid instead of letting it pass by as a footnote.

Some suggestions I've heard are to mention a gift to neighbors or friends, like an "iftar bowl," a a festive, decorative bowl or box full of dates or fruits with which people can break their fast, but also including the du'a for breaking the fast prominently displayed. Another suggestion about "eid baskets," giving gifts to friends and family--several gifts grouped together in baskets for each individual.

Any other ideas?

Ramadan Over-Planning

I just found out that on the same day I offered to help teach in a Ramadan workshop for new Muslims, there's an even better Ramadan seminar going on in another part of town. There's a very small bit of overlap, so I might go from one event to the next--should I suggest everyone do the same, I wonder, if they come to the first?

There's a big difference, I think, in the quality of a presentation offered by a da'ee, versus that by a shaykh. I hate to see Muslims having to compete with each other when events are offered at the same time (although this kind of seems to be directed to different groups of Muslims.) But it's one side effect of a larger community.

This Ramadan will be my first in Washington and I'm still learning about how things work here. There will be some different challenges here than I had in Raleigh--being further north, maghrib times comes much later, and so does isha, while fajr comes earlier, making taraweeh an even harder sacrifice. But I won't be working or in school this year so I should be able to be more flexible. (Sleeping during the day, for instance.)

Last year I saw one of my friends offering a weekly iftar for a group of convert sisters which seemed to me to benefit all of them. So I'm hoping to do something similar this year, here in Washington, by hosting a weekly iftar for ladies, especially new Muslims, and offering a short lesson before maghrib. Since in the Compass class I'm teaching we've covered salah, I thought it would help to review four different surahs, one each week, to explain the meaning and work on memorizing. So inshaaAllaah we'll do Al-Fatihah, mostly as review, then Al-Ikhlas, Al-Falaq, and An-Naas from the end of the Qur'an.

But again, I hope that my little iftar won't conflict with other events (iftars) that the sisters might like to attend, but there's only so much I can do. For me, visiting people for iftar in my first Ramadan was one of the best parts--I met so many new sisters and it really helped to increase my iman. Now that I have a place with my husband (who is totally supportive of my idea), I'd like to host other people and help make this Ramadan good for them, and a means towards an increase in iman and taqwa.

Graduate Studies

One thing I learned at the Fiqh of Salah class I took a few months ago was the importance of Qiyyam ul-Layl. Shaykh Yaser Birjas described it as an institution for the Sahabah, that they had to become like students of Qiyyam ul-Layl to develop themselves as Muslims.

I think Ramadan is also a kind of school, teaching us to be better Muslims. So we spend a month engaged in worship--fasting, prayer, charity, and general good deeds--but it's not supposed to stop there. In fact, it should be training us to engage in worship throughout the rest of the year. It's a "boot camp" of sorts to prepare us for the rest of our lives. But it's just the training, and we shouldn't leave everything off when Ramadan is over.

One thing that I started doing a lot more of this Ramadan is Qiyyam ul-Layl. And even though I felt like I didn't get as much from Ramadan as I had really hoped to (in terms of reading and memorizing Qur'an especially), I can at least say that Qiyyam became an easier and regular habit for me. I'm not talking about taraweeh exactly, but praying Qiyyam (specifically Tahajjud) before fajr time. Alhamdulillah that I was able to do it. Over the last few months I've really struggled in trying to make Qiyyam a regular habit, but Ramadan definitely helped me get to that point.

So I like to think now that I am going from the school of Ramadan to the school of Qiyyam ul-Layl, to another level of training and disciplining myself. I pray that Allah accepts my siyam (fasting) and also my qiyam (standing in prayer), and makes me one of those who regularly pray Qiyyam ul-Layl.

Its Middle is Forgiveness

One day when he (Sallallahu 'alaihi wa sallam) was giving the Friday khutbah, he climbed up his mimbar, he climbed up the pulpit - and his pulpit had 3 steps to it. And so he climbed up the first pulpit and he said out loud Ameen. Then he climbed up the second and he said Ameen. Then he climbed up the third and he said Ameen. So the companions were confused and they said: Oh! Messenger of Allah we have never seen you say Ameen every time you climb the pulpit; this is the first time we have heard you say Ameen. What was the reason for this? The Prophet (Sallallahu 'alaihi wa sallam) said: When I was climbing up the pulpit, Jibreel (AS) came to me and told me: O Muhammad (Sallallahu 'alaihi wa sallam)! Anyone in your nation who manages to be alive when Ramadan comes & yet cannot get his sins forgiven, then may he perish in the fire of Hell. Say Ameen. So the Prophet (Sallallahu 'alaihi wa sallam) said Ameen. Then he climbed the second step, Jibreel said: O Muhammad (Sallallahu 'alaihi wa sallam)! Anyone who manages to catch Laylatul Qadr & he does not manage to get his sins forgiven, may he perish in the fire of hell. Say ameen. So the Prophet (Sallallahu 'alaihi wa sallam) said ameen. And then he climbed the third one and he said: O Muhammad (Sallallahu 'alaihi wa sallam)! Anyone of your ummah who manages to catch his parents one of them or both when they are elderly and they need his help and he is not able to service them properly and get his sins forgiven then may he perish. Say ameen. And so he (Sallallahu 'alaihi wa sallam) said ameen. (link)

Ramadan Commitment

My roommate used to say about Ramadan that 30 days is really a commitment. You need to prepare yourself at the beginning of Ramadan to get through the entirety of it. And I know that if the next 20 days of Ramadan pass like the last 10 (well, 9, as today is the 10th) have, then I'll truly have missed out.

This year, the onset of Ramadan for me came with a few uncertainties and some big tasks on my plate. For example, I wasn't sure if I would be graduating or if I would need to take an additional class in the fall semester. I also have my own wedding coming soon inshaaAllaah which I need to plan, plus the honeymoon. While I was busy worrying about these things, I didn't make a clear plan for Ramadan, or set any goals. I pretty much had in mind some very light health and spiritual objectives, but I didn't clearly define them, so I haven't done a great job of meeting them.

And as the 10th of Ramadan is now upon us, I think my plan is past due--but I don't think it's too late, yet. Because Ramadan is a unique time of the year for spiritual development, I want to concentrate on Ramadan-specific spiritual goals (while bearing in mind that I don't want my health objectives to fall behind.) So this Ramadan, I want to finish reading a translation of the Qur'an in this month, because understanding the meaning, even a little bit of the meaning, vastly increases my faith and love for Islam. And after all, Ramadan is the month of the Qur'an, so the very least I can commit to is reading the meaning in English. I've read about 5 juz' so far, so I'm a little behind, but not devastatingly so. Another goal for me has been to listening to a Qur'an class. I found it tremendously beneficial last Ramadan, but the timing of the class is proving a difficulty. However, it might still be possible for me to fit it in if I plan ahead of time and stick to a schedule. The class is beneficial in that it helps me understand the Qur'an even more.

Another major Ramadan goal for me is to attend taraweeh prayers nightly unless I have some extreme excuse not to. Plus, I want to have khushoo' in those prayers. One night this Ramadan I spent most of the qiyyam thinking about wedding dresses--how embarrassing! Leaving the masjid after that, I decided that my worship needs to take priority. So the wedding planning will have to take a back seat for the rest of Ramadan.

I also want to make sure that I am not breaking fast alone. The first few days of Ramadan were a real blessing for me because I was able to spend them seeing people I hadn't seen in a long time--I've recently moved kind of far away from the masjid and so I haven't been around it quite as often. And truthfully, I do miss being so close. Since there are pretty much daily iftars at the masjid, I don't see any excuse to be breaking fast by myself.

These are just a few of my Ramadan goals, that I'm trying to push myself into achieving by writing them down and making them public. Maybe other people have different goals, but these are mine. Ramadan won't last forever, and I want to make the most of it while I can.

Intentional Fasting

Yay! I'm happy to say that in the last year (or so) I've lost 30 pounds! Reaching the 30-pound mark has been particularly exciting for me (alhamdulillah, and more on that later inshaaAllaah) but now, it'll nice to say goodbye inshaaAllaah to many more.

Which brings up an interesting point as we enter Ramadan (Ramadan Mubarak, by the way!) What should a person do, who is trying to lose weight/be healthy, when days are to be filled with fasting, and nights with prayer? Right before the start of this blessed month, I received an email filled with excellent tips about making the most of Ramadan, and avoiding some serious pitfalls. One such pitfall: intending to lose weight while fasting. Or more specifically, through fasting.

The problem, as the article rightly mentioned, is if a person starts Ramadan hoping that their fasting will help them to lose weight, then it's possible they're actually combining their intention. And our intentions to fast should be purely for the sake of Allah--and not for losing weight. The article suggested that some women especially might have this tendency to try to lose weight while they're fasting.

So I took serious note--am I jeopardizing the reward of my fasts? Am I fasting for other than Allah, because I want to lose weight, too? I don't think so, and I'll explain why: fasting in general doesn't necessarily help weight loss. In fact, it can actually make it harder. So for me, the fasting is for Allah, and the weight loss is something I'm just trying to work around it, something I'm trying to do in spite of the fasting.

The way I've lost the weight I've lost has been through plenty of exercise and a particular diet. Through eating, though--eating a lot of healthy foods throughout the day and as few as possible unhealthy foods. (Although I'm sure my coach would prefer I be a little more stringent on my classification of "healthy.") And even though the last few months have been successful in terms of weight loss, I never saw Ramadan as helpful to my weight loss goals. That's even as I lost about 10 pounds in both my first two Ramadans. Instead, Ramadan has seemed more of a hindrance, and I've been kind of worried about how I could deal with it. Of course I'd fast, and for the sake of Allah. Weight loss is part of my routine by now, something I'm trying for in spite of fasting.

Food is fuel. That's the mantra I've been trying to indoctrinate myself with. There are foods that make efficient fuels, and others that make not-so-efficient fuels. For example, a salad and grilled chicken breast is great fuel, while a can of soda is a very bad fuel. Every day would be filled with agonizing questions about the value and quality of my food choices--and I'm not just talking calories, but calorie density and nutrients. But if food is fuel--then going without food is going without fuel. If the food is fueling the weight loss then can you see how fasting could get in the way? (I'm trying to say that trying to utilize Ramadan fasting as a weight loss tool is a bad idea.)

But one great thing about Ramadan is that I don't have to think about food all day long--and this has always been the case. However, since I am trying to maintain a healthy diet still, I do pay a little more attention to what I eat at iftar and suhoor than I might have in previous years.

Even though fasting will create an almost automatic calorie deficit (necessary for weight loss), the hunger by iftar time has a tendency to make me just crazy and disregard all of my "guidelines." (Another reason not to use Ramadan fasting for weight loss.) Plus, the abundance and availability of a variety of rich, fried foods, sodas and sweets is an easy way to quickly ratchet up calorie counts. So in fact, even the non-fasting time requires restraint.

I can see how people gain weight in Ramadan--if you can imagine these kinds of foods as a regular diet for a month, added to a missing meal during the day which will slow metabolism (or so I've heard), a person will easily start ingesting more calories than their bodies need on a daily basis.

But that's really not healthy, and every year, everywhere (in casual conversation, blogs, emails, articles, twitter) we hear complaints about folks eating too much at iftars. Some times while fasting I used to get even more obsessed with food, somehow thinking that I wouldn't get enough. That's a mentality I think others might suffer from as well, but for health it should really disappear completely. There will be enough food. So for now I'm trying to eat a normal-sized portion of healthy (or as healthy as is available) foods at iftar time, plus healthy foods at suhoor time, just like I do outside of Ramadan.

But what might be more important is constantly renewing my intention, that my fasting is solely for the sake of Allah, and praying that He accepts it.

Heartwheel Journal SuperSuccess

MashaAllaah to Muhammad AlShareef and DiscoverU Life. This is what I got when I tried to go to www.heartwheeljournal.com

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Fasting Prescribed by Allah

SubhanAllah, Islam is truly a beautiful religion.

Last week I was at a meeting of an interfaith club I participate in--we meet about every three weeks. Unfortunately I was the only Muslim present, in company which can't help its inability to view me as a credible source on Islam. And due to the recent indictment and arrest of seven local Muslim brothers, the main topics were them and jihad, leaving me with a lot of explaining. I'm not convinced I did a great job, either.

But since our next meeting will fall during Ramadan, inshaaAllaah, I mentioned as much near the end of the meeting. I and the other participating Muslimah will be fasting, inshaaAllaah, and I just wanted to make them aware of that. So the idea of fasting in Ramadan received only a brief overview.

And so did the concept of fasting in the Jewish faith. And according to the Jewish woman present (the second Jewish lady who comes was also absent on this occasion), Islamic fasting isn't "real" fasting. I had to smile. It isn't she or I who decide what fasting is, because it's prescribed by Allah.

Now, there are many observant Jews who fast on occasions throughout the year, but as I understand it, there's one day when almost all Jews will fast. That's right, one day. And it's a 24-hour fast, so it's a fast for the entire day. It starts at sunset (which is the beginning of the day in both Jewish and Islamic calendars) and ends at the next sunset. But as I was informed, it's really a more than 24-hour fast because there are services that they must attend before they break their fasts.

(Mind, I'm not sure if this is representative of all Jews, just Conservative ones, her congregation, or maybe just herself. I just want to clarify as much.)

So in comparison to these 24-plus hours, our 29-30 days of fasting is, according to her, not real fasting. I can't help but smile when I say that.

Other people have their own ideas about fasting. Some people talk about "juice fasts" or "water fasts" and the like--basically they abstain from solid food and drink only liquids, like juice, or maybe only water. So they find that the way Muslims fast--because they eat food at night, or because they don't drink any water during the day--isn't real fasting.

But I say they've missed the point. Muslims don't fast to be hungry. If they did, maybe they would adopt a Jewish model and prolong the hunger (i.e., for a whole day) that comes from not eating anything. And Muslims don't fast to clear their digestive systems or lose weight. Else, they might adopt the other model, by permitting water or juice during fasting.

Muslims, on the other hand, fast for the sole reason that it was prescribed by Allah. They do it (a) because Allah commanded it, and (b) in the manner that Allah commanded it.

Maybe all that some people get out of Ramadan is being hungry. And maybe all some people get is eating less food. But as we all know, the purpose of Ramadan fasting, according to the oft-repeated ayah from the Qur'an:

O you who believe! Observing As-Saum (the fasting) is prescribed for you as it was prescribed for those before you, that you may become Al-Muttaqun (the pious - see V.2:2). 2:183

So we fast, in short, to become the people of taqwa, the people who have taqwa, Al-Muttaqoon. And after 3 weeks of diligent fasting, abstention from food and liquids during the time, can have a profound spiritual effect on the heart. And that's when we kick it up a notch, with even more prayer, and istighfar. Fasting does so much more on a spiritual level, towards achieving piety, than can be quantified or explained.

The Jewish day of fasting I referred to above is Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement, and it is preceded by 10 days during which Jews will seek repentance, and try to amend their behavior through extra acts of worship. So they might fast and perform charity, and of course ask for forgiveness. Sounds a bit like Ramadan, doesn't it? So maybe we don't fast for some 25 hours but in fact as Muslims we have a much longer period during which we are trying to amend our behavior, and seek forgiveness.

Furthermore, the month of Ramadan is divided into 3 sets of 10 nights--the first for mercy, the second for forgiveness, and the third for salvation. The fasting intensifies, and the worship intensifies. As Ramadan progresses, it's not that the fasting becomes harder--in fact, our bodies begin to adjust early on to the new schedule--but we start losing sleep as well. In fact, the loss of sleep has typically been for me the hardest part of Ramadan. And the fasting is only a reminder of the importance of worship and righteousness in Ramadan; a stepping stone towards everything else--the mercy, forgiveness, and salvation. It's not the end in itself.

And like Islam, it's a gift from Allah.