With soap, please

I like soap. I like how it gets all foamy and makes your hands all slippery. I think it's cool how the soap decreases the surface tension of the water (making bubbles!) and bonds with the dirt. So it lets the water mix with the dirt so it can wash it off your hands, instead of just washing over the dirt. But I especially like when soap leaves your hands smelling nice after you wash.

So I buy soap at Bath & Body Works, and I like nothing if not variety. In my bathroom, at the moment, I have four different soap dispensers available for use, plus a bottle of aromatherapy lotion. I have one dispenser that matches the bathroom decor, with some generic kind of soap in it. I have two containers of "gentle foaming" anti-bacterial soap, one is "Coconut Lime Verbena" and the other is "White Citrus." I also have one dispenser of the "deep cleansing" anti-bacterial scrubbing soap in "Rain-Kissed Leaves" scent.

With all this variety, I started to wonder what other people would choose, as far as soap, when they visited my bathroom. Do people prefer the deep cleansing or foaming?

Well, last time I had company I asked a person, after exiting the bathroom, which kind of soap they used. Imagine my shock and dismay (or, um, disgust) as the following conversation ensued:

"I didn't use soap."

"Why not?"

"I didn't want to get my hands wet."

"So you didn't even rinse your hands?"

"OKAY! I'll go wash my hands!"

Weird excuses, huh? I guess I've been thinking more about soap since the recent study about what kind of messages are likely to prompt people to wash their hands with soap. For the record, a wide variety of soaps available might not be enough to convince people to wash with soap. But if any of you ever decide to visit me, please remember... the soap is there for a reason, and not just decoration.

Making Hijab Easy

Even though I might normally get very bored, very quickly when talking about hijab, it's an issue I had a hard time dealing with in the first stages of my entry into Islam. For many people, however, it can be a very important issue, including those who don't wear it, just started wearing it, or aren't even Muslim at all. Maybe it's because hijab is so visible, and very easy to cause polarizing points of view.

When approaching Islam, I think it's better to start with the fundamentals of the faith, instead of tackling an external issue like hijab. So I will say upfront that a Muslim is someone who believes in God and submits to His will and His commandments. A Muslim woman, therefore, should strive to obey God's commandments and instructions, including covering herself in a manner appropriate in Islam, as mentioned in the Qur'an (24:31.)

And even though the obligation of hijab gets a lot of people talking, what I really want to say here is something that I don't think gets as much discussion. If we get past the issue of why wear hijab (here are some good reason why, if you aren't sure), what comes next is actually putting it on, the how, and steps you can take to make wearing hijab easier.

The first step is to learn more about Islam; not about Islamic history, or fiqh, but learn about Allah, and learn about the Hereafter. Read the Qur'an, for instance. This can help increase your faith in Allah, and will make it easier to love and follow Islam.

The second step is to sincerely make du'a to Allah, that He make Islam easy to follow. Pray that He joins your heart to what He loves, and makes you hate that which He hates. And pray that He turns your heart towards His obedience, because He is, after all, the Turner of the Hearts.

Another thing that will make wearing hijab easier is to spend more social time around other women or girls who wear hijab. It's easy for us to adopt the habits and behaviors of our friends and companions, and harder to be different. So if we spend time around people who don't wear hijab or aren't even Muslim, it will be even harder to start wearing it. The opposite is also true, that it will become easier to wear it when you are spending time around others who wear it. This step and the previous two are also useful advice for sisters who are trying to wear jilbabs routinely, or even niqab.

And one more thing to do to make wearing hijab easier is to find some scarves and clothing that you would like to wear. In the northern hemisphere now it's becoming colder, and that should make wearing hijab easier because wearing more clothing in general is becoming acceptable. This is a great time to start wearing hijab as a habit, because by the time spring rolls around it should be much easier to wear it. So find clothes that are comfortable, or fashionable, or whatever it takes to make you wear them, provided that they can qualify for hijab. So instead of wearing an ugly skirt that doesn't fit, for example, try wearing a trendy one you feel comfortable donning in public. Find scarves that can match or even enhance your outfits. If you can see it as a potentially fashionable accessory instead of a dowdy afterthought, that might make it easier to start wearing regularly. If you don't know where to find headscarves, try looking at local malls and department stores. Even Target and Wal-Mart now carry many kinds of wrap style hijabs at great prices--take advantage of that.

And the very last step is just to put it on. Don't talk yourself out of it by overemphasizing the commitment. Set small challenges--try to wear it just for one hour, then just for one day. Looking at it as a small commitment instead of a long-term one might help fight the whispers of Shaytaan--he's only trying to make you doubt yourself, and delay you from the path of righteousness.

And when things get hard, as they inevitably will, go back to the first two steps, and ask Allah to make it easy, to strengthen your resolve, and to guide you along the Straight Path.

Have We not opened your breast for you (O Muhammad (Peace be upon him))?
And removed from you your burden,
Which weighed down your back?
And raised high your fame?
So verily, with the hardship, there is relief,
Verily, with the hardship, there is relief.
So when you have finished (from your occupation), then stand up for Allah's worship (i.e. stand up for prayer).
And to your Lord (Alone) turn (all your intentions and hopes and) your invocations.
Surat Ash-Sharh (94)

Disappointment

I was pretty disappointed with myself today. I wanted to talk to my Sunday Schoolers about Halloween, and I wound up doing exactly the thing I wanted to avoid--telling them things are "haraam."

I guess what I want to do with the class is convince them about the superiority of Islam, and its applicability to their lives. I thought I could do it today, when talking about Halloween, but now I think now. May Allah help those girls--increase them in faith and ease their difficulties.

Adventures in Salad

So, I know a couple of my friends are excellent chefs, and that's great for them, really. I'm just not in that club of people who ever learned how to cook anything properly. And there are very few things that I know how to make with any degree of confidence, if they require more than two ingredients.

But that doesn't stop me from trying. There's a restaurant here in the Raleigh area that has some really excellent salad called fatoush. It's got cucumbers, tomatoes, and peppers in it, with a dressing of olive oil, garlic and lemon juice. And it's got some herbs in it, too. And since I've been trying to eat healthier myself (and hopefully get my parents to eat healthier), I ambitiously attempted to make the salad myself, at home.

First I went to the grocery store--the new Harris Teeter (I love Harris Teeter... I'm gonna miss it when I move inshaaAllaah) that's just opened up by my house--and bought the ingredients. Peppers, tomatoes, a cucumber, lemon juice (since I don't have a juicer I didn't buy fresh lemons) and I also bought some fresh parsley, mint, and cilantro.

When I got home, I went about learning how to chop herbs. That's right folks, I didn't know how to chop fresh herbs. And some might say that I still don't. The recipe called for about 2-3 tablespoons of each kind of herb chopped, so I pulled some from the bunch, chopped off the stems, and went about chopping as best I could. But I didn't measure and really had no idea how much would amount to 2-3 tablespoons of chopped herbs. And I apparently cut way, way, too much. Of everything. I had probably about a cup of each type of herb.

Then I went and cut up a huge tomato, a longish cucumber, one green and one red bell pepper. This I knew how to do (more or less) since I'd at least done it before. But with me, any kind of fresh vegetable (or fruit) always means adventure. I was putting my veggies and herbs in the same dish and realized that I had nearly as many herbs as everything else! So I took out about half of them and set them aside.

Then I realized I didn't have any garlic--and asked my mom to buy me some on the way home. Garlic is something I've only just learned how to chop. Actually, what I learned is that if you squash a clove of garlic under your knife (like a chef's knife) then it's really easy to peel, and then I just put it in a garlic press. The recipe called for about 3 cloves. I added 5, just because it was kinda fun to squash them.

Then I added some olive oil and lemon juice. But I didn't feel like measuring, really--so I've got no real clue how much oil or juice I added. I know I was supposed to add about 1/2 cup of oil, and the "juice of 2 lemons." But since I didn't have actual lemons, it's not like I could tell how many lemons' worth of juice I was actually adding.

Now I've got a huge bowl of salad that will burn your lips, and nobody will eat it but me. I know my problem with it is that there's just too much parsley, or cilantro, or mint, or garlic, although probably all that. So I just pick out the other pieces with a fork, toss in some pita bread (which thankfully dulls the potency) and try to eat it as fast as I can before the taste catches up with me.

Engagement Picture

Haha... not mine.

My brother and his fiance had their engagement pictures taken a week or so ago. Most of them are crooked like this one, so you have to tilt your head to see. But anyway, they look cute so I thought I'd put a photo up here.

Their wedding is 3 weeks after mine inshaaAllaah, on Thanksgiving weekend.

Changing Worship

Last week my dad and I went to Red Lobster for lunch. We hadn't gone out just the two of us in a while so it was (mostly) nice to have a while to talk to him. One of the things that came up right as we came home was a change in worship practices (in Christian churches.) I would've liked to pursue the topic further but I was already late to a meeting and had to rush out again right away.

At the time, he implicitly suggested that one reason he doesn't like attending church nowadays is that the worship services have changed from what he was used to. His question: God doesn't change, so why should we change the way we worship?

I don't think he knows, but that alone is a very clear argument for Islam. What bothers him, I think is that more "contemporary" services cater to a younger crowd, trying to bring them into church rather than push them away. So they use contemporary music, live bands in the worship service, instead of singing the same old tired hymns with an organ and a choir. But that's what he finds comfortable--the hymns and the choir.

But did people sing these hymns with a choir and an organ while Jesus was alive? Surely not. What about in the first millennium of Christianity? Nope! In fact, singing hymns is a fairly recent development that at best only goes back a few hundred years. That means that yes, sure enough, worship has changed. It changed language (from Aramaic, to Greek, to Latin, before ever making it into English, and it's taken many other courses as well) as has even the very "Word of God" according to Christians. It's changed in many ways over the years and will continue to change. Do you know why?

Because Christians aren't worshiping the way God told humans to worship Him. What makes a person think that God likes hymns any more than he likes rock? The proponents of contemporary worship would certainly consider that any grateful noise they make should suffice if it makes them happy and elevates their spirits. And isn't that what it's all about? Maybe, if you're Christian.

That's why it works as an argument for Islam. You see, Muslims have been worshiping the exact same way since the time of the last Prophet of Islam (Muhammad ﷺ) and that's over 1400 years! They pray the same way, they read the same book in the same language, and conduct worship services exactly the same way. Do you know why?

Because they were taught, by God, how to worship Him, and that's what they do.

Muslim Day of Prayer?

How can there be an event called a "Muslim Day of Prayer" when Muslims pray 5 times (minimum!) every single day? Even Friday, the day of Jumu'ah, is a day of congregational prayer. So what does it mean to have a "Muslim Day of Prayer?"

I saw the flyers for the event at my masjid, though I've never heard any Muslims refer to the prayer on capitol hill as a "Day of Prayer," a title I've seen only from non-Muslims. Trying to make it sound... I dunno, evil? What's evil about prayer? Or public prayer?

I don't know how the event went overall, but when I found this article in my Google Reader I was just a little confused about the legitimacy of the criticism.

Conservative Christians need to learn be taught the values that they in fact share with Muslims. Don't they know that Muslims value the same things they value? I don't say this to capitulate to non-Muslims, but just as a simple statement. What's our excuse as Muslims (and on a personal level, my own excuse) for non-Muslims being ignorant about our beliefs?

Analogy Technique

When my dad asks me question that starts with "What do you think about..." I should be on my guard. I would normally interpret such a question to mean that the questioner is seeking to learn my thoughts on a particular matter. But when it comes to my dad, apparently not. Rather, it means, "let me see if you have any good reason for not believing the same thing I do." Or something to that effect.

Since my dad met my fiance (whom he loved,) he's been a little more open to talking about Islam with me. That's great, really, since I kind of botched my best chances to give da'wah to my parents. But yet my dad, as with most of my family, is swimming so deep in propaganda he can't see which way is up. After hearing him describe how my fiance would discuss Islam, I decided to try a change in tactics when the "What do you think about..." questions come up.

And I got that chance yesterday while driving to a nearby town (about an hour away) to visit my brother and sister et al. The question was, "What do you think about people who say Muslims are trying to take over the country?"

Now, what I think is that it's a lot of inane propaganda, vitriol from neocons and zionists, largely unfounded attempts to poison the American psyche against Muslims by perpetuating a state of fear which weakens the public defense of liberty in favor of "security." But I didn't say anything like that.

What I said was that America goes through cycles of having a targeted bias against a particular group of people, and I pointed out that some years ago there was widespread fear of and hatred towards Polish, Irish, and Italian immigrants, and there was even religious tension. Many Americans feared that if Kennedy were to win the White House in the 1960 presidential election, that the Pope would have a say in the running of the American government. People were afraid that Catholics would be taking over the then-mostly Protestant nation.

In retrospect, that fear seems wholly ridiculous, and except in very tight circles, Protestants and Catholics are more or less considered to be equally Christian. Especially, that is, in light of other non-Christian faiths, like Judaism or Islam. And in fact, Jews were for a long time a very unpopular minority in America. Although I didn't mention that.

But by mentioning Kennedy and Catholics, my dad could recall from his own experience how his family was reacting to the idea of a Catholic man running for the highest office. And I think he really started to see my viewpoint, acknowledging the possibility at least that the right-wing media's targeting of Muslims might be in the same vein as similar propaganda campaigns throughout American history. Instead of seeing Muslims as a true and legitimate threat, he explored the notion that Muslims are just the modern-day victims of a smear campaign. I'm not sure he was convinced of that, but at least he seemed open to the idea. While in fact I said very little to illustrate my point, more than making a simple analogy.

My dad then compared my technique to that of my fiance, which I will take as a compliment.

Regular Prayer

My Lord! Make me one who establishes regular prayer, and also (raise such) among my offspring, O Our Lord! And accept my prayer.

O Our Lord! Cover (Us) with Your forgiveness: me, my parents, and (all) believers, on the day that the reckoning will be established! (14:40-41)

One of the first du'aat I learned to make in my salah was one from the Qur'an, a du'a of Ibraheem. In it, Ibraheem asks Allah to make him someone who establishes prayer--although the translation I learned inserted the word "regular," i.e., "establishes regular prayer." This du'a reminds me, at the end of every salah, the important of salah, of establishing it and praying it regularly.

On just about every prayer timetable I've seen, part of an ayah is listed somewhere on the page. One translation of the part of the ayah, 4:103, is "Verily, the prayer is enjoined on the believers at fixed hours." The idea is to remind whoever reads that prayer table about the importance of praying regularly at the appropriate times.

Now a person can view the idea of regular prayer as either a burden, or a blessing. I have a hunch most non-Muslims, and plenty of Muslims, probably see it as a burden. And undoubtedly Shaytan would rather us see it as a burden, so he can easily distract us from it, urge us to procrastinate it, and eventually even convince us to abandon it altogether. May Allah protect the believers from his whispers.

There are benefits in having the prayers spread throughout the day. It gives you a spiritual retreat at key points during the day, to help you break up the day and refresh you. And the times of the salah are intricately connected with ideal daily behavior.

We learn the prayer times from the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ, who learned them from the Angel Jibreel over two days. According to Ibn Abbas, the Angel Jibreel visited the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ at the beginning of the each of the prayer times on the first day to lead him in prayer, and on the second day led him in prayer at the end of the prayer times, except for maghrib prayer. The times have been further specified by Abdullah bin 'Amr bin al-'As, based on the sun and sky, and scholars have differed slightly in their opinions as to the exact timing.

What's clear however is that the prayers are based on the timing of the sun, indicating that our days should follow a similar schedule. It also keeps us Muslims aware of the motion of the sun throughout the day, as it crosses the sky, and throughout the year as the time it takes to traverse the sky changes. In this way the timings of prayers keeps you alert, and it keeps you from forming a lazy habit or tradition when it comes to the prayer--your schedule will have to be flexible somewhat throughout the year. The beginning and end times for each prayer vary between some schools of thought, though not drastically so and not without evidence.

The first prayer of a waking day is fajr, and there is unanimous agreement regarding its start and end times. It begins at the time of the "second dawn" or "true dawn." While the sun is at one particular angle below the horizon, there will appear the "first dawn" known as the "false dawn," when the light spreads vertically. That is not the start of fajr time, which actually comes later, when the sun is high enough for the dawn light to spread laterally across the horizon. It ends when the sun rises. This means that our day should begin before the sun comes up. There's also a special blessing in the fajr time before the sun rises. While our minds and bodies are refreshed, it can be a very productive time of day before the worries and business of the day start to clog our minds.

The start time of dhuhr is also unanimously agreed upon--that it is when the sun declines from its zenith. Geographically, unless a person is at the equator he will have a small amount of shadow, even when the sun is at its zenith, but the zenith is when the shadow has reached its minimum size. There are two opinions about the end time of dhuhr, though they all agree that dhuhr ends at the time when asr begins. The first opinion, the Maliki, Shafi'i, and Hanbali opinion, is that dhuhr ends when the length of an object's shadow is equal to its height (plus the "extra shadow" just mentioned.) The second opinion, the Hanafi opinion, is that dhuhr ends when the length of an object's shadow is twice its height (plus the "extra shadow.") This is based on a hadith that dhuhr is to be delayed on hot days until the day begins to cool off.

The start time of asr is agreed by all to be the end time of dhuhr, and the same differences just mentioned apply. There is also agreement as to the end time of asr, that it be when the sun has completely set. Scholars also agree that it is better to pray asr earlier (than later) as long as its in the specified time. Hanafi scholars prefer it to be delayed as long as the sun hasn't started to change color.

By unanimous agreement, maghrib time begins when the sun has set, though there are basically three opinions regarding its end time. The first is the Maliki and new Shafi'i opinion, that basically the time for maghrib ends once enough time has passed to actually make wudhu, adhan, iqama, and pray five raka'at (3 for fard, 2 for sunnah.) In other words, maghrib needs to be prayed right away with no "extended time." The Hanbali and old Shafi'i opinion is that maghrib needs to be prayed by the time the red twilight has faded, while the Hanafi opinion is that it may be prayed until the white twilight has faded. But they all pretty much agree that it's best to pray maghrib at the beginning of its time.

When it comes to isha, there is unanimous agreement that it begins when the twilight has faded, but there are the same differing opinions about which twilight that means. The Maliki and Shafi'i opinions, for which there is no extended time, also say isha starts after the twilight has faded. When the sun sets, the first twilight is the red twilight, followed by the white twilight, followed by the blue twilight, just as a point of reference. There are two opinions about the end time of isha. The first is the Hanafi opinion, which allows for isha to be prayed up until the time for fajr arrives. The Maliki, Shafi'i, and Hanbali opinions are that isha may be prayed until the end of the first half, or first third of the night. This is calculated as the time between the beginning of isha and the beginning of fajr, then split into thirds or halves and added to the time isha begins.

The salah itself is an organizational tool, to help you structure your life. Sometimes people (you know who you are) will say that time is money. But no, time is life. Whenever a day passes, part of you goes with it. Following the salah forces you to begin your working day with fajr time--you shouldn't go to bed after salat al-fajr. You also see that there is time to take a break, for dhuhr, a good time to eat lunch, and maybe take a nap. Asr time, when the day starts to draw to a close, is the time to stop working and see to your family. Eat dinner and prepare for bed, these are things to do in the evenings.

Even the prohibited times of prayer reminds us of the appropriate structure for the day, so we don't turn into monks and try to pray the entire day--there are times that we should spend doing other things as well. But the larger point of regular prayer is to prevent other things, our life in this dunya, from stunting our relationship with Allah.

Scary Scarves

What's wrong with hijab? Why is it so terrifying? In schools, courts, we see the hijab being banned, or being mocked. Hatred of it runs so deep among non-Muslims that even Muslims start to have a hard time accepting hijab.

Of course, hard feelings aren't universal. But what I want to know is why the hijab specifically seems to be such a polarizing issue--between different faiths and even between Muslims.